Back Away From The Low-Carb Ice Cream, and Nobody Will Get Hurt

I am misunderstood. 

No, this isn't the angst of the everyday over-dramatic, pity-party of one teenager.

I don't feel unwanted, mistreated or neglected.

I don't feel like the world had done me wrong, and that "no one understands me".

But there is a part of me that many don't understand - my Diabetes. 

There's a lot of things I am not - weak, sick, depressed, angry at life's circumstances.
There's a lot of things I am - healthy, filled with love for life, happy, strong... and frustrated. 

I'm at the point where usually I go into a conversation already expecting someone to make some kind of uneducated comment about my Diabetes.

"You got Diabetes because you didn't take care of yourself."

"It must suck cooking and not being able to eat any of it!"

"Oh right, you can't have any of the Brownies, can you? Sucks for you."
"Ugh, please don't do that right next to me. Can't you go do that in private or something?"

"I can't stand needles. I don't know how you do it."

How do I do it? Umm, how about, what's the alternative? Death? Sound good to you?

You might not have that much respect for your life, but I can guarantee that I have enough for the both of us. And as long as I take each blessed breath that God gives me, that Christ allows me to live yet another day, I will fight for the precious life that I have been given. I refuse to just give up because life handed me something unexpected. My life is harder, sure, the needles hurt me and insulin stings and makes my skin sensitive sometimes. I get bruises whenever I give myself a shot in the arm, my fingertips are nothing but ugly, pinpricked calluses and I'm sick of people staring at me like I'm a heroine addict in a restaurant. I hate counting my carbs, having to guess and worry about the world-spinning, falling-out-from-underneath-me feeling of a low or the hit-by-a-bus feeling of a high. Sure, it sucks, but it would suck a lot less if people could just keep their ignorant comments to themselves.

"Oh, you're one of those health freaks?" A man serving food to me at the mall sneered at me when I made a comment to my father about the chicken being low carb. I stared at him for a second, chewing my lip and pondering how to tell him off. "I have Diabetes," I told him, giving him a glare. "So yeah. I guess you could say I am one of those "health freaks".

"You're actually looking at the nutrition information?" My Zaxby's server asked, laughing at me. Lighten up, one meal isn't going to make you fat!" 

"You're still on insulin? I'm already off that stuff," an older woman tells me in the grocery store. "I control my Diabetes by diet and exercise. If you'd take better care of yourself, you could, too." 

I'm sick of it. I've said it before, no, I don't want pity - I just want people to be educated. If you don't know about my disease, just ask. I'll happily tell you about it. But don't just assume things, don't just say comments to me that are likely to piss me off because you really don't know what you're talking about. 

I know it sounds harsh, but I don't deal with multiple shots a day just for people to tell me I'm not taking good enough care of myself or that I'm not allowed to have a bite of cake. News flash: Sugar won't kill me. Sometimes, though, I think that might be easier - that way I wouldn't have to disprove all the Diabetes police when they come after me, trying to take away my ice cream and chocolate!

It simply feels that no matter how hard you work at controlling your Diabetes, people always seem to find something about your disease to criticize.

If you aren't one of those people - I thank you.
If you are - just go eat your bolus-free milkshake and hush up!