My life has been so busy, especially these past 3.5 months, I feel I've scarcely had a chance to breathe. My life has been one perpetual study session, and when I wasn't studying, I felt guilty that I wasn't studying. That, or I was running my business, balancing phone calls with class lectures and driving up to Atlanta on the weekends to go be a princess.
Diabetes has kind of taken the backburner during this time. I think I've hardly had time to think about it! It hasn't really played a particularly large part in my life. It's easy to get caught up in the daily grind - wake up, test my Blood Sugar, go to the dining hall for breakfast. I keep my school ID in my meter case out of convenience. Have a snack before lunch, eat, snack in the afternoon, dinner, and snack before bed. That's a lot of snacks, so thank goodness the 100-calorie (and ironically more low-carb than the sugar free) Klondike bars are usually buy one get one free. I'm kind of happy to report that nothing major has happened. I've had relatively few lows, and with the exception of the 347 last night (yeah... there was baking involved) my sugars have been kept relatively under control.
It feels so different from a year ago, when everything was so new and different to me. I used to carry around my little green JDRF cooler with everything inside - carb counting book, glucagon emergency kit, an entire box of syringes, test strips, lancets, log books, the works. Now I just carry my little meter case with Novolog attached. I don't bring my carb book as often, because I can guess carbs very well on my own now. I remember my first attempt at bolusing based on carb counting - one big, epic disaster in which I ended up giving myself random shots every 15 minutes when I decided to scarf down another large chocolate chip cookie. Yep, I've come far since then. Simple and discreet, I live as normal a life as possible as long as I have those two powerful, lifesaving tools by my side... at all times. Freedom? Maybe not, I think a little sadly. But as close to it as I feel I will ever get.
It's been over a year now - April 3rd was my "Diabetes Anniversary". One year with Diabetes, and life has changed, but I've settled down. Sometimes, I wonder how Diabetes will play into my future. Will it affect how many kids I can have? Will I ever have to choose between affording insulin over something else that I need? Will I ever get health insurance? Will there ever be a cure?
Time flies. I'm a different person than who I was a year ago. More mature (?) (I like to think - or maybe I just feel that possessing a credit card finally gives me "adult" rights). It just makes me wondering, where will I be in another year? Two, when I graduate Wesleyan (changed my mind again - staying two more years. I promise, guys.) Three? Four to five, when I finish grad school? I don't know. It's easy at first glance to think you know where you're going with your future, but then crazy things happen like you get Diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes.
So I don't know. But I won't think about it too hard now, or I'll drive myself crazy. For now, I'll settle with a brief summer to-do list:
- Read a book (textbooks don't count)
- Use Rosetta Stone
- Run. At least once.
- SWIM. I haven't been in a pool for AGES.
- Play Sims. (lol. Did I just write that?)
- Get a tan.
- Wash my car. (The last time I washed it, I was in Florida..................a year ago................)
- BLOG MORE! I PROMISE!
I'd say that's about it for now.
So, Happy Sunday all!
I guess I'll attach some narcissistic pictures since I don't take very many of those out of costume these days. :)
I love the idea of a summer to-do list. I've been working on one myself. I'm glad to see you back on here!
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