Glad for the Unknown.

I think frequently back to my last couple of weekends prior to learning that I had been accepted to Mercer's PT program. It was a very difficult time in my life for me, but I was doing my best to get myself out and around Macon and enjoy myself. I had grown to love Macon, and all its nooks and crannies. Macon was a place of comfort for me. It was where I lived. It was where I worked. My friends were there, my business, and I had all of my favourite places. Coffee shop: check. Walking Rose Hill Cemetery and the flooded, poorly made trails around the Ocmulgee. Kroger was a familiar, welcoming place. Traffic was never crowded - the gas was cheap - and Mercer and Wesleyan's campus made wonderful walks. The library downtown was my happy place.

What could be better?

Back then, I didn't think I was going to get into PT school that year. So what if I I just took a year off? Or... a few? I was tired. Maybe I just needed a break. Maybe I just needed to enjoy my youth. Recover from the hardships of that year. It wouldn't be so bad.
And so I was happy to receive an interview for an Admissions Counselor position at Wesleyan College, as well as an interview for a pharmaceutical sales rep for Quintiles. I'd be a good sales rep for Diabetes medications - I mean, I know a lot about them. Both cushy positions that could allow me to still live in Macon. I didn't want to leave! Macon was home. 

As I prepared a date for my Quintiles interview and sat in the interview seat for a counselor position, I could really believe what I was telling myself when I thought that this was the best move for me. Yes, I was worried - what if I didn't get into graduate school? How much harder was it going to be to re-apply? What was it going to take for me to make myself stand out in applications next year - what more could I do than what I had already done? I had decent grades, I had the volunteer time, but I was young, and my experience in PT was only so-so.
Maybe PT wasn't even right for me.

My life was full of questions.
Then one night after the counselor interview and the day before my Quintiles interview in Atlanta, I received a call. It was from David Taylor from the Mercer PT program.
"Congratulations. We'd like to extend you acceptance to our program for Fall."
I couldn't hide my shock. "Oh my gosh...really? Wow. Ok. Wow." I probably sounded like a babbling idiot. But if Dr. Taylor knew all of the things going on in my life at the time - at how little solid stuff I had to grab on to - and how much he'd just shifted my life again, maybe he'd understand.

And just like that, my life suddenly became scarily solid as I prepared for a move.
There would be no job.
No more interviews.
No familiarity.
And no more Macon.

My life was thrust from familiarity to living in a place with no friends, no family, no one. Nothing familiar.
And it was terrifying at the time. You know? It still is, sometimes. Sometimes I stop and think and then realize that it's like walking on a narrow bridge and forgetting how high up you are until you look down.
My life could no longer be cushy and familiar. Now it's hard and there's new experiences every day in this great big city of lights and traffic.
It matches my ambition, I've found.

And while the road hasn't been easy, some days I look back on that time in my life when I was considering all these endless choices and I think....

I'm so glad I decided not to stay in Macon and be an admission counselor. (And there's nothing against that job at all, truly. I admire how hard those people work.) But looking back, I realize that  that was a role that was never meant for me.
We're all meant for different things, and I'm glad that part of that role for my life meant being a part of something not comfortable and familiar at all - but exciting and unknown.